Monday

Normally, I don't have a problem with Mondays. Sometimes Monday is almost a relief from the all-too-hectic weekend. But today, I have a problem with Monday. Day Light Savings should never be permitted on a Monday.
 
Here's how my Monday morning went from 5:00 to 8:00 a.m.:
 
5:04 Wake up. Debate not going to gym. Go to gym.
5:30 Run 30 minutes.
6:15 Get home. Realize I don't have house key. Pitch dark and cold outside.
6:16 Return to car. Turn on heat. Text husband 8 times to open door. No answer.
6:19 Still in car. Text husband again, threaten to call on phone if he doesn't answer. No answer.
6:22 Call husband's cell three times. No answer. Do not leave VM. (Note: his cell is right next to the bed.)
6:27 Leave warm car to bang on front door until husband wakes up to let me into the house.
6:33 Get back in bed procrastinating, drinking coffee, and wishing I never went to gym.
6:47 Make lunches for kids.
7:00 Dog pees on floor. Husband steps in it.
7:21 Son clogs toilet and it overflows.
7:32 Husband takes oldest daughter to school because I'm still in my workout clothes and bathrobe.
7:34-7:37 Take shower.
8:04 Husband returns home. I put on mascara and sneeze.
8:06 Run out of house to take son to school. Forget my lunch.
8:07 Decide it's too late to take son. Return inside to get lunch and switch with husband. He takes son to school with our youngest daughter still in pjs and I go straight to work.
8:22 Arrive at work. No access to email. Server malfunctioning.
9:55 Earthquake rattles Los Angeles.
9:57 Consider calling it a day and walking to liquor store down the street.


So, Monday, you can go to hell. Seriously.

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